Friday, June 02, 2006

I Miss My Boo

Well first off, while traveling from Ohio to Florida, I saw more Ohio and Florida tags (not counting my time in Ohio and Florida) than any other state, including the ones I was traveling through. While in the middle of no where (Near Stinky Creek Rd) Tennessee, traffic suddenly slowed to 50mph or so (from about twice that fast)--what was the cause? Well there was an overturned tractor trailer (well just the trailer). It was mangled as fuck, and its payload (a giant roll of sheet metal that had unrolled), rocks, bits of sign, chunks of rail, and other shit was all over the median and THE ROAD! What was odd, was that the truck was missing, as was the driver, any police, tow truck, or other signs than someone gives a fuck that there is chaos on the roadway. Odd. What was cool was that people still managed to cruise along at 50 over/around that shit, which more than I can say for folks in Columbus during a drizzle. Still it was bizarre.

I love Japanese food, and I drive a Japanese car. I wouldn't settle for kim chee if I wanted sushi, so why would someone settle for a kia when they obviously must have wanted a Honda? I could care less if it weren't for the fact that 80% of the traffic hold ups were due to fucking piece of shit Kias in the "fast lane". They just can't hack it, especially in the mountains. Oh, and don't get me started on the old farts who think just because they are driving faster than ever before that they are entitled to the "fast" lane. Move over you old-ass crackers.

As a kid I used to go to MGM Studios and Universal Studios. At each place you could tour the back lots and see sets that looked like fake streets, but they were all facades. In this day of digital effects, that shit is no longer necessary. So what do those peeps do for a living? They design elaborate facades for fireworks stores in Tennessee, where a small convenience store sized place will look like a Macys with enough plywood and paint. They usually sell gas too (don't light a match). The only other business I'd see on the roadside in Tennessee are adult stores. Some even sell used adult books--eeewww!!!! A few were about the size of a Giant Eagle (a midwestern grocery store chain with big stores). I should have stopped at one to get a blow up doll so I could drive in the car pool lanes in Atlanta. At least I got to go to Ikea in Atlanta, which is thus far the highlight of my trip. I dunno why I like the place so much--perhaps I'm bonding with my Scandinavian roots.

It was also cool to finally make it to Florida. I knew I was there when I saw fields of goats hopping around, and the ostrich farms. I guess ostrich meat never quit took off the way it was supposed to. Anyone ever eat the shit?

I miss my boo

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